standing up for yourself

Hello Everyone,

Today is #BossLadyWednesday and initially I struggled about what to post. Yes, I am new to blogging and my editorial calendar is still very much in the works. What I have promised myself is that at minimum I will post my Boss Lady Wednesday posts every week. So as I was sinking about what to write to you on my weekly post about how to be a boss lady, I realized that there was an issue in my professional role that I needed to address recently.

After the issue was mentioned to me – I immediately reacted but it did not express my true sentiments about the situation to the person who brought it up. I got on the train, read my book and on the walk home I realized how much this issue upset me. It served as a reminder to me that even though we have no formal rules against X, because you are one to bend when we ask, we are asking you to limit doing X.

I was pissed. I spoke to B about it and decided that I would write an email – which he attempted to convince me not to do. Then, I spoke to my mother about it. Finally, I sent an email that I would not regret. The response I received lacked heart but addressed that the issue should have never been brought up in the first place, as it was not an issue with our organization.

There was no negative backlash, no dramatic results, just an admission that “hey this should not have been brought up to you when there is no formal policy about it”.

It is hard to stand up for yourself, especially when it means standing up to a supervisor or even a higher entity, but it is so important to address something that makes you uncomfortable, or is inappropriate as long as you handle it in the appropriate manner. If you have an issue with your boss and it’s the first time this has happened, I think it is important for you to talk to them about how you are feeling. If it’s the second time, I would bring it up to them again in an email where you reference that this is the second time the issue has happened. Email trails can help you if anything goes sour one way or the other but we are hoping that this issue is minor. If it comes to this, three strikes and you are out. I find it would be most appropriate to speak to your HR department and if you don’t have one, I imagine that their boss would be the next place to go.

Standing up for yourself is not easy but it will help you appreciate yourself, be appreciated by others, and most importantly keep you happy. Stewing over an issue without addressing it will cause you extra stress and is bad for your overall well being. So if you are reading this and realizing that there is something that you need to take care of, use this as a source of inspiration to make things better in your life. If you have any questions about how to handle a situation, please feel free to comment below or email me.

Thanks for reading!

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